Miles Davis

I wonder if you are thinking of me too… that’s the first time I wonder about you today. You went from being thought of all the time to barely there. Progress!

Last night, the song “It Never Entered My Mind” by Miles Davis Quintet was playing on my Spotify. Beautiful song. It moved me. Finally—a song that exactly knows how I feel. A song without lyrics but a song with jazz and trumpet melodies.

Everyone take a listen:

https://open.spotify.com/track/0m560umx98aGNhKQvrFZMT

But you know what.. that the beauty of writing on this thing– therapeutic and I am pushing through now, realizing that I no longer miss you.

I refuse to sit on time with this–you don’t deserve it. Thank goodness I am moving on and moving forward.

Amazing how one can meet new and interesting people in such a short amount of time to make one see things in a brighter and exciting perspective aka HOPE

Fuck the rest.

It never entered my mind. Define “it” for yourself.

 

 

New

Yeah I met someone new. Great story how we met, and I realize that if I can think about being with someone else, I have finally moved on and there is no looking back.

It is great to get to know someone new, someone that is actually more for you. Someone who makes effort to get to know you.

And even tho there is a possibility there is no real connection or just won’t lead to anywhere—I am happy.

 

Mixed Feelings

Some days I feel good.

Other days I feel angry.

Most of the time, I am sad.

I looked at the picture I took of the Christmas card HG gave me (before I destroyed it when I last saw him), and my heart sank.

And then I remember what he did and how he lied..and I am angry all over again for a moment and fall back into sadness.

..I guess I have to admit.. I was beginning to fall for him when I read that card.

 

hg

Why

Why..

Hurts me that I have not heard from you, HG. Not even to check in on me. Nada.

I have no idea whats going on in your mind and I am so curious. I am upset that I still miss you. That there is no real closure. I am still hurt and still sad.

I went on a date–and it didn’t go all too well. He wasn’t as sweet as you. I don’t even want to get into details.

I still have feelings for you. The ones with butterflies—but you don’t deserve them.