R Hottie = Fuckboy

Ugh… update… if anyone is even still reading this or following me for that matter.

So, for the last month and a half R Hottie and I have been having a “textship” or however the fuck you call it. Which is fine with me, because to be brutally honest, I wasn’t ready for someone like R Hottie and his breadcrumbs were weak. But then he got really interested again. The same kind of attention and 24/7 of it.

FI-nally we meet up yesterday to hang out after a series of trying to see each other but we keep missing each other because of business trips, family events, etc.

Mind you, I have NOT sent him any nudes or anything of the sort. Definitely pics of me looking fine as fuck and classy sweet pics too. He loved them all. He would say things like “I can’t wait to see you.” “Thinking of you.” “You’re a treasure.” “You are gorgeous.” You are beautiful.” “Sexy.”

Anyway, so I come over to his place and I knew that something physical was going to happen. I was so for it. Just two consenting adults that have an attraction towards each other.

R Hottie opens his front door to greet me and let me in and looks … well…. handsome and really sexy. We kissed immediately and just hung out for a bit talking about his trip to NoLa and he noticed I was wearing an outfit that I purposefully did not wear a bra with (or panties for that matter).. and we made it to 3rd base.

Super hot.

Very sexy.

We then left to get some tacos and then came back. We had a nice time just talking about art, families, work, etc. And 3rd base happens again.

We continue to just chill and like an hour later he tells me “You are gonna be upset but I forgot I told my friend I was going to pass by for their improv show.”

Um, yea, annoyed because this is the THIRD date he disrupts. He even told me before we met up that he wanted to take me out and yet doesn’t even invite me to join him to go to the show.

So he walks me to my car, kisses me passionately and tells me he will call me after the show.


No call. And I will certainly not reach out.

It is now day after and still no call or text. No more 24/7 attention.


Any advice?

R Hottie = Fuckboy.

What’s worse is that for just a moment I thought about my ex and got sad-mad at him all over again. I blame him that I am dating again and just got my first fuckboy (when I reallyyyy hoped he wasn’t one). But whatever, HG is still the biggest loser of them all.

Feel me?

Hand in Hand

You are on my noodle, R Hottie. Contact me.

I last heard from you last week Wednesday morning. You liked my art on FB a couple days ago.

Thanks for the bread crumbs, much? You don’t come across to me as the fuckboy type.

According to the advice from platonic male friends, or as Chris Rock would call them “Dicks in glass cases”, you aren’t ready.




So, today is Monday and last I heard from R Hottie was Saturday morning.

I know this sounds silly… but I really think (at least from what I have learned from my experiences) it is the man that should be pursuing the woman.

No, I have not texted back– I want him to want to contact me and be curious about me.

He went from 100 to practically, well, zero. And I have no idea why. No, we haven’t slept together. Maybe that’s all he wanted after a couple of dates–sex. But he didn’t lead me to believe that was his sole interest. I would have definitely picked that up.

Should I reach out? Or just chalk it up to him losing interest? I really thought he liked me. He even said so. Maybe he didn’t feel the connection anymore after date #2 (even though he has reached out a couple of times). As far as I know I think he really ought to be the one to reach out.

On another note entirely:

I have “hung out” with let’s call him, Loud Clapper (more than a few times within the last couple of months since HG and I broke up). It’s a nickname I have for him– he claps so loud when watching games, it can be embarrassing. Sounds like sonic booms. Hahaha.. still! he is a cool guy.. and a nice distraction. And when cums, he YELLS.. like really really really LOUD.

While LC is just a cool guy to distract myself with — he is not what I really want. I have known him now a couple of years, we met through work and there was definitely that physical attraction but none of it actually ever happened until recently.

I want R Hottie. And yes to whomever is reading this— I have definitely been working on myself (aside from all the almost nightly partying).

At least I know what I want.



R Hottie : Hotline Bling

The next day after meeting R Hottie, I was SURE I was going to hear from him. I felt excited, happy–sexy even.

I woke up early enough to see that it was a beautiful day and made the solid decision on lazy thought to go to the beach either today or tomorrow.

Of course, the next thought that popped into my mind: I wonder when I will hear from him?

Such a girl moment. I proceeded with my day running errands and ate at Suviche.

Then I get a FB message notification on my phone…

It was him! R Hottie! Wait? What? Why is he contacting me here through FB?

FB Message reads:
So, my real name has a unique spelling– he remembered and found me.

He then called me right when I was getting home and we talked on the phone for a while:

“I don’t know why my phone didn’t save your number. I was pretty bummed about it, even my friends made fun of me. Found you on FB….”

The rest of the call was nice and he was going to a Gala that night which he had to get ready for . He told me he was looking forward to seeing me again. As was I!

I met up with a friend later and we went out and had a blast bar and lounge hopping. Checked out Electric Pickle (meh too early), Beaker & Gray (meh just wasn’t feeling it), went to Lost Weekend (Ok, we love the cheap drinks–we stay), then finally ended up at Purdy (the Dirty Purdy!)

Got home pretty tired, like at 4AM . Knocked hella out.

Woke up at 8AM-ish and saw:

Missed call from R Hottie : 6:35AM


My Truth

Oh you know.. just daydreaming.

Dear —,

I want to kiss you, feel our bodies warmth–our touch. I want to fall and rise in love with my best friend. Ride off into the sunset together and come home to each other. I want a family, sure I do–whether it ends up just being me and you or miracles of our own, I am happy. Whatever happens to either one of us or both of us we are each other’s support system. Let’s get married and love each other in every way possible. Kiss my entire body. Kiss your entire body. Worship our bodies. Nourish each other’s souls. Faithful, loyal, trust and sheer will is in my blood–offer me the same.

Be absolutely ridiculously happy.